


Together

by Sleepless_in_Starbucks



Series: Tumblr Prompt Fills [5]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Bad Self-Care, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Starvation, Multi, Prompt Fill, There's like one swear, ace!Deceit, apobia mentions/thoughts, bread loaf abuse, from tumblr, no characters are aphobic don't worry, romantic DLAMP - Freeform, vague implications of sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-07-31
Packaged: 2020-07-28 01:15:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20055640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleepless_in_Starbucks/pseuds/Sleepless_in_Starbucks
Summary: Prompt: May I please ask for an asexual Deceit? Thank you. 🖤💜





	Together

Deceit wasn’t sure he had ever sunk out as quickly as he just did before. The appearance back in his room was certainly too fast, and he rested a hand on the wall, stabilizing himself. He raised his free hand to cover his eyes, the memory of the scene he had just fled from still perfectly sharp in mind.

_ “Deceit… we’re sure you’ve noticed we’re all together.” _

_ _ _ “I certainly haven’t.” _

_ _ _ “And we were wondering…” _

_ _ _ “Or better put, we think it would be vastly enjoyable for all parties…” _

_ _ _ “...if you’d like to be a part of this ‘together?’” _

_ _ _ “...” _

_ _ _ “Deceit?” _

_ _ _ “No thanks.” _

_ _ And then he had sunk out before any of the other sides could determine whether or not his final statement had been a lie or not. Even Deceit himself couldn’t answer that question.

Because, in all truth, the answer to their question should have been yes. No amount of lies or emotional walls could forever hide the fact that somewhere along the line, Deceit had fallen  _ hard _ for the Light sides. And ever since he had revealed himself to Thomas, the metaphorical pit he was diving into only got deeper.

Family dinners, movie marathons, board game nights- all bonding activities he had been invited to now that Thomas accepted his existence. And as awkward as it was to be the outcast of the group (in more ways than one) every moment he had spent with them had been its own treasure.

But there within laid the second side of the double-edged blade. While the events were “family-friendly,” per say, sometimes things got… out of hand. Lewd comments made over cards, suggestive ways of eating dinners, make out sessions during the movie marathons that ended with Deceit slipping away as shirts started to come off.

Deceit knew their relationship was not built on the physical. Ninety-five percent of it was just romance and tender words and sweet actions. But for the five percent it wasn’t... 

Well, it was an aspect Deceit wanted absolutely nothing to deal with, to put it simply. And, if he was being honest with himself (ha), he had no idea how the others would react to that.

Would they be mad? Disappointed? Call him selfish? Disrespect his wishes? Break up immediately?

He didn’t know. He didn’t want to find out.

With a sigh, Deceit moved from the wall to flop onto his bed. He figured if he gave it a few days to let his rejection of the others’ offer fade into the background, facing them would be easy enough, and they could all just go back to how things were before they had asked.

Easy, right?

Deceit ignored the part of him that yelled ‘wrong.’

~~

Deceit slowly creaked open his door, looking out. Finding the hallway empty, he slipped into it, making his way as stealthily as possible towards the kitchen.

After having thought about the interaction for a long enough time, and perhaps having spent too long slowly stuffing the pain in his heart when he thought about everything he had rejected by rejecting their offer into a box that got thrown away in his mental garbage can, Deceit decided that never facing the Light sides ever again was, in fact, the best course of action.

Can’t get attached if you never see them. Can’t get another offer if they can’t talk to you. Can’t be forced to answer questions you wanted nothing to do with if no one has any reason to question you.

It had been a foolproof plan for about a week, the handful of leftover Halloween candy and solitary (and slightly stale) packet of crackers in his room enough to survive off of at first. Now, however, he was starving to the point that he couldn’t even bear to wait for nighttime to make his kitchen heist.

As he tiptoed his way down the stairs, he briefly considered simply sinking in and out. The problem with that approach, however, was the general air that appearing brought with it. He had a good chance of grabbing what he needed and sinking out again before the Light sides could get to him, but he had decided he preferred his chances with the sneaking.

Turning into the kitchen, he stole a glance at the living room. A movie was playing, something Disney he guessed, and there were three heads and a pair of feet visible over the couch. Good. Light sides accounted for.

Glancing around the kitchen, Deceit grabbed the first possibly fulfilling thing he saw- a loaf of bread. It would get him through a couple of days, at least, and Deceit could make a more conveniently timed food run then. Resisting the urge to eat a slice right then and there- the bag would crinkle and attract attention- Deceit picked it up quietly and turned to leave.

Only to find Roman standing in the doorway. The creative side looked both confused and concerned as he took in the scene. Deceit, too stunned at having been caught to respond, tightened his grip on the bread, as if Roman might try to steal it from him otherwise.

By the time he came to his senses enough to realize he should probably sink out, Patton had joined Roman.

“Deceit?” Patton asked, sounding worried. Odd. It wasn’t like Deceit hadn’t disappeared into his room before. “You’re out of your room.”

Deceit shook his head, too distracted to tell the truth. Patton and Roman glanced at each other, and Deceit wasn’t sure what thought they were trying to share telepathically, but he doubted he liked it.

“We need to talk.” Roman said after a moment, only confirming Deceit’s suspicions. When the liar of a side reacted with a glance around, clearly looking for an escape, Roman frowned. “It’s nothing bad. There’s just… things we need to clarify.”

Deceit decided that sounded even worse than ‘we need to talk’ but he didn’t speak up, slowly following the two Light sides out into the living room, still clutching his bread loaf.

Out there, he found the tv off and Virgil and Logan still on the couch, both looking as worried as their right-brain counterparts. As Roman and Patton settled down beside them, Deceit slipped into the armchair. Hunching into himself and peering at the others from the chair, he thought about how many times they had been in the same formation for move night.

Good thing he didn’t go to those anymore, because this experience was nearly guaranteed to ruin them.

For a moment, uncomfortable silence stretched, no one wanting to start the ball rolling. Eventually, Logan cleared his throat and said, “So. You’ve been in your room for a week.”

Deceit shook his head silently.

“This is your first time leaving your room since you went in.”

Another shake

“And you started this… self-isolation immediately after we asked you to join our romantic relationship.”

Deceit hesitated for a moment before once more shaking his head. Patton made a distressed noise, and the other three sides seemed to have expressions mixed with anger and sadness. He couldn’t wrap his head around why, though- he had said no, and disappeared to ease the awkwardness. They still had each other. This reaction seemed extreme.

Virgil tugged at his sleeves. “Deceit, if our proposition made you uncomfortable-”

“Or our relationship upset you-” Roman added, sounding defensive.

“-you could have just told us so instead of disappearing.” Patton finished, wringing his hands.

Deceit waved the concern off. “It’s nothing. It’s fine.” He said, not sure if it was a lie or not. 

Patton frowned. “It really isn’t. Deceit… we’re worried.”

“Why?”

Logan tugged at his tie, clearly troubled, as he stated, “You’re paler, thinner, have bags under your eyes, look ready to bolt at any minute, and are holding that loaf of bread like it’s a lifeline.”

“Not to mention you clearly don’t want to talk to us.” Roman added.

“Or even look at us.” Virgil mumbled, still loud enough to be heard.

Deceit didn’t respond, busy mentally thinking about the week. Maybe all the hours spent Definitely Not Pining were, in fact, not a healthy way to spend the time.

“And with this all coming right after we admitted we wanted you to be our boyfriend, it’s not hard to guess what set it all off.” Patton finished off, shrinking into himself as he said it. “We just want to know what we can do so that you… you...”

“You don’t hate us.” Virgil offered, sounding bitter. At the words, Deceit felt his heart squeeze. The rest of the Light sides immediately turning their full, sad, awful looking attention onto him didn’t help.

They thought he hated them. They thought he disapproved of their relationship, that he had hated the offer to be a part of it. They thought his avoidance of them wasn’t an attempt to ease the awkwardness of rejected love, but an attempt to simply just avoid them.

The people he loved thought he hated them.

“Deceit?” Patton prodded, breaking Deceit out of his thoughts. He looked down, realizing that while he was lost in his thoughts he had started to squeeze the loaf. Now it was a lumpy ball of dough. “Please, is there anything we ca-”

“I don’t hate you.” Deceit cut him off, still squeezing the bread, forcing his words to ring true. “Or, uh, your relationship.”

“Then why did you stay away?” Roman pressed, one hand straying to his sword, as if he thought the answer was slayable. Deceit managed to fight off the chuckle that came from that thought.

By his nature, all of Deceit’s thoughts for a response were lies. Recant that he didn’t hate them, say he lost track of time, the door got jammed- anything. But, if in no other aspect of his life, Deceit was tired of lying about this one.

“I did not avoid you all because I disliked your relationship.” He started, swallowing thickly before he continued, “The opposite, in fact, was true.”

The Light sides shared a glance before Logan said, “So… you did want to be part of our romantic relationship?”

Deceit nodded.

Another shared glance. “Then…” Virgil trailed off, looking confused, “then why would you say no?”

Steeling himself, Deceit replied, “I’m asexual.” He pulled back into himself at their puzzled expressions. “Sex-repulsed asexual, to be exact.”

Deceit was ready for and expecting many reactions: anger, disbelief, disgust, sadness. He wasn’t expecting them to keep looking befuddled, glancing between themselves and him.

“So…?” Patton asked.

Deceit frowned. They were going to make him explain this to them? “So I couldn’t- wouldn’t- do any of… that.” He waved a hand as if that could explain exactly what the ‘that’ meant.

The silence stretched after Deceit finished, the others seeming to still be processing what he thought would be a very easy concept to grasp. He was considering sinking out, using the bread ball as a distraction, when Logan spoke up.

“Deceit, would I be right in assuming that you thought, because of your asexuality, we would not want you in our romantic relationship?”

Deceit cocked an eyebrow, briefly letting the truth fall away as he answered, “Of course not.”

Patton’s expression turned heartbroken as he moved to the edge of the couch, resting a hand on the deceitful side’s knee when he didn’t flinch away. “Deceit, we asked you to join our relationship before we love you, not because we want to have sex with you.”

“But… but isn’t sex a part of that relationship?”

“Sure, but it’s not like it’s required.” Roman replied. “It’s just another way we show our love. You’re not lesser for showing your love in different ways.”

“And the fact that you literally don’t give a fuck doesn’t change how we feel about you.” Virgil added, earning a halfhearted glare from Patton for the swear.

Deceit looked down, focusing on Patton’s hand on his knee, still clutching the bread ball but not as tightly. Everything they said felt too good to be true, but the thought of it being true, to be part of their together, to not worry about one day the other shoe dropping and them leaving-

He didn’t realize he had started to tremble until Patton murmured “Oh, kiddo,” and moved forward to wrap him in a gentle hug that only got stronger when Deceit didn’t try to fight him off. The bread ball dropped from his hands as he focused on keeping enough composure to not flat out sob into Patton’s shoulder as three sets of arms joined the hug.

They stayed in a comfortable partial silence, broken only by the others whispering sweet nothings that Deceit had wanted to hear directed at him for so long, for too long; them all holding each other, or better put, them all holding  _ him _ .

After a few minutes, Logan cleared his throat, and said, “Given these recent events, I think a reproposal is in order.”

The other three Light sides hummed in agreement immediately.

“Love,” Logan started, quieter so Deceit knew it was directed at him, “would you care to be part of our together?”

“Yes.” Deceit responded without a second of hesitation, the truth for once feeling sweet on his tongue as the arms around him tightened. He knew there was a chance they were lying, that they thought he’d ‘come around’ and would leave him when he didn’t, that something would go wrong and he’d be outcasted again. But this?

This felt like the truth.

**Author's Note:**

> My Tumblr: https://sleepless-in-starbucks.tumblr.com/


End file.
